I still have my feet on the ground, I just wear better shoes.
Oprah Winfrey

Truly great friends are hard to find, difficult to leave, and impossible to forget.
Author Unknown

Life is too short to stuff a mushroom.
Shirley Conran

My great-grandmother was your great-great-grandfather’s mistress, so how about it?
Camilla Parker Bowles (to Prince Charles)

The word ‘aerobics’ came about when the gym instructors got together and said: If we’re going to charge $10 an hour, we can’t call it jumping up and down.
Rita Rudner

A policeman stopped me and said: “Would you please blow into this bag, sir?” I said: “What for, officer?” He said: “My chips are too hot.”
Tommy Cooper